Well, I guess that seals it: I'm officially old. On or about the day that this issue of National DRAGSTER lands in your mailbox, I'll be turning 50. The big five-o. Half a century of nitro-inhaling, Diet Coke-chugging, Pop-Tartdevouring existence. Where did the time go?
When I wake up May 22, my first thought most likely will be, "Well, I'm only a day older than I was yesterday." The next will probably be something eloquent, something along the lines of, "Holy crap. I'm 50."
Man, it seems like only yesterday that I walked through the doors of NHRA HQ on Riverside Drive in North Hollywood, a young pup just two days past his 22nd birthday, with eyes as big as saucers and ambitions twice as big. I thought I knew a lot more than I did, and I've learned more than I ever thought I would. And I'm still learning.
Now I'm ready to mail my application to the Geezers Club. Kids used to say, "Don't trust anyone over 30." Funny, now that I'm 50, I think more people trust me than ever. Maybe because I'm no longer that kid whose drag racing knowledge consisted only of what he had read in magazines; now, most of it is born of either experience and firsthand witness or the interest to investigate what I didn't see. I'm not getting older, baby, I'm just getting better. Pope John XXIII said, "Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age." (Check me out ... quoting a pope!) That's me; look, I'm already whining.
There's no shortage of information to be found on the Internet. Just Google "Turning 50." Hundreds of jokes. Ways to celebrate your 50th birthday. YouTube videos and Facebook groups. And facts, lots of facts.
"Every seven and a half seconds, a baby boomer turns 50," they tell me. Or "Approximately 11,000 49-year-olds go to bed each night and wake up the next morning finding themselves over the hill." Charles Schulz, creator of the Peanuts comic strip, said, "Once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed." (Author Bruce Lansky wrote, "I much prefer being over the hill to being under it." Agreed!)
So, I'm over the hill. At least that explains why I've been working so hard. I never realized I was climbing a hill. So, "it's all downhill from here," right? Is that a good thing? I mean, it is when you reach the top of a ski lift, right? Going downhill is certainly more exhilarating than going uphill - from a speed standpoint, that is ... but what am I now speeding toward? Social Security? Retirement? Wrinkles? A walker? Adult diapers? Good grief, Charlie Brown.
Looking around, a lot of people say, "50 is the new 40!" but I'm guessing the people saying it are probably all over 50 anyway. My 40s certainly weren't bad - I became a grandpa, remained employed for another 10 years at the only job I ever really wanted to do, saw great drag races, met even more interesting people, watched new racing stars emerge, visited cool places, did cool things.
So, what do I have to show for 50 years? I've driven a race car at 160 mph. I've won a Wally. I've hang glided. I've parasailed. I've snowmobiled. I've skied a black-diamond slope. Been down the hill in a bobsled. Been to lunch with Don Prudhomme. Trapshooting with Robert Hight. Stayed overnight at Jeg Coughlin's house. Sat in the cockpit of a running nitro Funny Car. Have almost 2,000 Facebook "friends." Been interviewed on TV. Been asked for my autograph. Scored the championship-winning goal. Never been arrested. Never ran out of gas. Made women cry and babies laugh. And vice versa.
Life expectancy is about 75, so I still have a third of a tank left, and I plan to use every drop and hope that there's a large reserve, too. So, what's in my next 50 years? Well, I plan to write until my fingers are too arthritic to push the keys. I hope that by then, voice-recognition software will have advanced sufficiently and it won't matter. I'll keep on keeping on, following this sport and the people who make it interesting. I'll continue to marvel at new technology and old memories.
Here's what I'm NOT going to do: I'm not going to bookmark the AARP website. I'm not going to make a bucket list. I'm not going to write a drag racing tell-all (though I could!).
It's kind of silly to obsess over 50, especially when I look around at our sport and see so many people not only still actively involved, but some also doing better than ever. "The Greek?" Eightysomething and going strong. John Force turned 61 this month. Hector Arana? 51 and just finding his groove. Mike Edwards? 52 and enjoying the best years of his career. The list goes on and on. Shoot, NHRA founder Wally Parks was 47 when I was born and still had another 47 years to go.
I've also always found a certain delight in knowing that my life's work, this wonderful publication, also was born in 1960. We were meant to be together, to grow up together, to not only age gracefully together but also to just keep getting better.
A lot has changed since 1960, when there were only 24 issues of National DRAGSTER printed each year and there was only one race - the Nationals - on the national event schedule. In May 1960, "Ike" was president, bread was 20 cents a loaf, milk $1.04 a gallon. Gas? Ha! 26 cents bought you a gallon! The average income was around $5,200, and you could get a new house for about $12K.
On the NHRA front, Amarillo Dragway opened May 8 with the famous Texas-Oklahoma vs. California-Ohio Challenge. NHRA instituted a new national record procedure that allowed records to be set at divisional and regional races under the supervision of an NHRA certification crew. Previously, NHRA national records only could be set at the Nationals. Glen Ward set the AA/D national record in Inyokern, Calif., at 9.53 and Eddie Hill the A/D mark at 8.84 in Amarillo.
1960 was smack in the middle of NHRA's six-year "nitro ban" and was the year that the Winter Nationals got started. It was in February (and two words!), but it was in Daytona Beach, Fla., not Pomona, and presented by NHRA and NASCAR. Lewis Carden won Top Eliminator, posting low e.t. of 9.88. Don Garlits "came out of retirement" to drive brother Ed's gas-burning dragster to top speed at 165 mph. Leonard Harris and the amazing Albertson Olds won Top Eliminator at the Nationals in Detroit. Buddy Garner of Hobbs, N.M., was crowned NHRA's first world champ. Yes, it was a very good year.
Conversely, I was 9 when current champs Tony Schumacher and Robert Hight were born. Somehow, I've gone from being "the kid" at National DRAGSTER to an elder statesman. How did that happen? Watch out, Littlefield ... you're only 24 years away.
Still, it has been a great first 50 years, especially the last 28, which have been spent here at National DRAGSTER. And, seriously, all things considered, though, I'm not worried about turning, um, you know. Honestly. ND
[Sidebar]
"It's kind of silly to obsess over 50, especially when I look around at our sport and see so many people not only still actively involved, but some also doing better than ever."
[Author Affiliation]
pburgess@nhra.com
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